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Monday, February 14, 2011

A day in the life of a babysitter...

Being a babysitter equals a long day....

6:00 am Bootcamp (easiest part of my day)

7:15 head to Kelley's house

7:35 the TV is on and the kids are hanging out as I relieve my lil' sis Ashley from duties

7:45 I turn off the TV. It is too loud and I am sure I can keep them entertained

8:00 I am already feeling tired from entertaining them

8:30 Pru leaves the living room and comes back with her diaper in hand, poop everywhere

8:50 I am finally done cleaning Pru up and realize that Sidney has gotten into the fish bowl that has no fish but fish rocks in it. Fish rocks are EVERYWHERE, and mixed in the fish rocks bowl is a load of nickels, dime, quarters and pennies, that was on the buffet (Needless to say when I left in the evening quarters, nickels, and pennies were still mixed in with this. But my dad did clean up the fish rocks all over the floor)

9:00 We head upstairs to put some clothes on and Sid declares Pru needs to wear his clothes, then gets upset when I protest so I put her in his too big pants and his over-sized shirt. She seems happy so I leave it

9:15 I decide to turn on the TV because it is all a little too much for me, so we watch one episode of Shawn the Sheep

10:00 We make rice krispie bars and while I am trying to make sure the marshmallows and butter on the stove don't burn Sid "helps out" by pouring the rice krispies box into the bowl on the table. About 1 cup of the rice krispies makes it into the bowl, the rest hit the table and floor

10:15 finishing up the rice krispie treats while washing Pru's hands 3 different times (really every time they got a bit too sticky for her, only to get sticky again), watching Sid pick up M&Ms put them in his mouth and then put his hands back in the rice krispie mix, watching Pru wipe her nose with her hands and then put them back into the krsipie mx, (luckily I am on a specific diet right now and knew I wouldn't be eating the rice krispie bars at all, and in fact seeing all this helped me not want one) calling my sis asking where the broom is, sweeping up with Sid (helping again) and he is brushing all the krisipies from the table to the floor and then scooting around on the floor scooping up krsipies with his hands.(both Pru and Sid had krispie crumbs everywhere)

10:50 I answer a lot of questions and swing them around and wipe Pru's nose again (I might have forgotten to mention this but by this time I have already done it 10 times, 5 of which ended up with her crying)

11:00 I start to make lunch

11:15 Sidney informs me that I have cut the sandwiches "too big" and they "need to be smaller, like mom does it" I do this and they aren't small enough, I cut them again and he seems happy. They eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and a banana and milk

11:20 Sidney informs me that I have poured his milk into the wrong glass and "I won't drink it out of this one, the tall green one instead". I pour his milk into the tall green glass

11:35 Sidney asks for his treat and I hand him his and since Pru isn't done eating set hers on the counter. He eats half of his, walks to the counter, sets his almost gone, with all M&Ms picked out bar down and asks Pru "which one is yours which one is mine?" When Pru points in the general direction of the counter he says, "Yes Pru, this one is mine!" Then he picks hers up, the little rascal. Pru starts crying...

11:45 Sid asks for more milk and I give it to him, only to have him stick his fingers in it and splash his sister with it. When I ask him to stop throwing milk at his sister he looks at me and says, "I was only splashing."

11:55 I tell Sid and Pru to go in the bathroom and wash up and I start on cleaning up lunch mess

12:00 I go into the bathroom and water is EVERYWHERE. I step right into it and at the same time Sid says, "I peed my pants". I look down and realize, I stepped in pee

12:05-12:45 I try to get them to go down for a nap which begins a series of different issues including; Sid telling me Pru sleeps in his room, they want the music louder, they need the curtains open, I forgot some things when I said prayers, I forgot more things when I did them again, I need to sing 'You are my sunshine', and again, and again, and again, they need to change back into their pajamas for nap, Sid has to run into his pj's rather than stepping into them like your average kid, he runs and jumps into them repeated times before he finally gets it just right, I need to sing you are my sunshine again, I forgot to pray for Lennon too, and finally the door closes and they are chatting away....I call my sis to see how this all works, them napping in the same room and such, and she informs me that Pru DOES NOT sleep in the same room as Sid. I open the door and start over....Move Pru, turn up the music so Pru can hear it (at Sid's request of course), then he needs his blue blanket which is downstairs, then he gets it and wants me to sing again, then...I text my sister and say "this is never going to happen" and finally the door closes and they are off to nap

1:00 my dad calls and asks if I'd like a little help and should he come over early and I say, "HECK YES!"

2:20 after nap they wake up, I TURN ON THE TV

2:45 Dad comes over and I breathe I sigh of relief. I also put them in the bathtub so that I can contain them, they love this and have no idea it is for my own sanity

3:45 Yes I left them in the tub for an hour, but I kept putting warm water in it and hung out on the toilet thanking the Lord above that they were both in one place at one time so I could keep an eye on them. I didn't even care that I was getting splashed left and right with water. They came out like prunes

3:50 We clean up, get dressed and TURN ON THE TV AGAIN, until their dad arrives at 4:30pm, thank you!

TV, the technique is wonderful. I didn’t even dream it would be so good. But I would never let my children come close to the thing.

-Vladimir Zworykin: Comments of developer of television

Lisa adds...

Until I realized how much relief I would get with them hanging out in front of it.

8 comments:

  1. This is, hands down, the funniest post I have ever read! Tears streaming down my face in sympathy for you as well as wishing I could have seen this all.
    You are AWESOME!

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  2. You did it!!! Just so you know, I use the bathtub trick EVERYday. :-) three hours is our record. They love it!!!!

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  3. ditto on Carrie's comment ... you do need to write more as you do have talent in that area. As for the babysitting, all I can say ... is

    ...it went much better for Nana on Saturday ... of course I brought a bag of tricks, food, valenting books, construction paper, glue, markers and so glad that I deceided not to make a treat but rather bring a treat with me ...

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  4. This is hilarious. You retained all that information???? You should become a cop you would have great report writing skills! :P

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  5. Too cute! still smiling!

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  6. Just read this, too funny!! LOVE IT

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  7. Holy Geez!! You are amazing. :)

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